Vampire Rain [X360]

Wouldn't it be cool if Splinter Cell hero, Sam Fischer, got time off to fight vampires now and again? Vampire Rain bears more than a passing resemblance to that Tom Clancy smash, except its protagonist is sent off to a Los Angeles plagued by zombie vampires (would anyone notice the difference, we wonder?). His mission -- you guessed it -- is to wipe them out.

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Appropriately, it rains an awful lot in this game. Rain dulls the super-senses of the vampires, you see. It's always dark, too, and both these things serve to draw a bit of a veil over the game's visuals, which are decidedly unimpressive. If you told us this was an Xbox game, we wouldn't be at all surprised -- until we looked at the price-tag, which is decidedly next-gen. Flat textures, stiff animations, and ugly models mean these vampires certainly aren't the sexy Anne Rice variety.

And she sure didn't write the script, either. Now, when it comes to game dialogue and voice acting, our standards are pretty low. They have to be. But Vampire Rain really falls short. This is Resident Evil standard stuff here, but without the all the kitsch and retro-fashionable connotations. It's just plain grim. The plot's predictable, the cut- scenes, while decently presented, just plod, and every time one of the supporting cast opens their mouth, you can't help but hope the Nightwalkers drag them off before they can get a word out.

In most stealth games, getting into combat represents a failure on your part -- it's just not what you're supposed to do. But when you gotta tear stuff up, you gotta tear stuff up, right? Roll into Vampire Rain with that attitude and you'll get real familiar with the Game Over screen, real fast. Once a Nightwalker spots you, they're on you in no time, and will kill you in one or two hits. For most of the game, you're equipped with weapons that do about as much damage as harsh language -- you might as well toss them at the vampires.

In better stealth games, getting spotted isn't the end of the world. You have options: you can run and hide and hope the guard loses interest, or you can slug it out, man to man. Maybe you have some cool decoys to throw him off the scent. Not so in Vampire Rain. You're seen, you're dead. No second chances.