25 to Life [PC]

Download and Buy 25 to Life at Yahoo! Games on Demand.

SOCOM in the ghetto -- there are few cooler, more potential-packed game premises than that. Mix a single-player run-and-gun campaign with some online action, and you have a surefire hit, right? Not when the game itself commits more crimes than the Bloods and Crips put together.

Being sentenced to play 25 to Life's single-player seems more like punishment than anything else. You start as a gangsta turned family man who wants to get out the game (players will be able to relate), but gets suckered into one final job. Guess what? Things go bad -- in more ways than one.

The story isn't awful in and of itself; but the execution is terrible. For example, you fight your way out of a crime scene to your car, then call your homeboy before making like a tree and getting the hell out of there. Then, you make it back to your home 'hood, but are all of a sudden without the weapon you had at level's end -- no explanation. Instead of cutscenes to set things up, you get a sentence or two at the load screen. Why bother even having a story to begin with if you're going to treat it so poorly?

All of these gripes pale in comparison to the actual gameplay. At best, it's mediocre third-person shooting. You'll pick it up relatively quick and there are a decent amount of options. At worst, it's some of the cheapest, laziest game design seen in a long time. It takes a full clip to bring down an enemy, and often where the reticule shows is not where your bullets go. Nothing is worse than lining up a sweet headshot, only to miss entirely for no apparent reason.

Your enemies, on the other hand, have Olympic sharpshooter-level aim. You'll take a shotgun blast from 100 yards that will knock off half your health, or be killed from some insane angle one floor below you. Your foes are also psychic, and will spot your location through walls and other so-called obstacles. Oh, and they can be set on fire and still shoot you between the eyes. Instead of balancing things to make the game more reasonable, it just throws plenty of medkits at you.

The graphics in 25 to Life are uglier than a prison tat. The blood effects are probably the highlight, though they end up looking shiny like glass. For low points, take your pick between a camera that sometimes shows the inside of your character's head, animation so bad that your lower half remains still when swinging a bat, or cutscenes where effort wasn't even put into making mouths move. The level design is bland, and there's no interaction as a consolation.

The game's audio had more potential -- but as you've probably already learned about 25 to Life, it doesn't live up to its potential in any respect. You'll hear some good hip hop tracks -- Geto Boys, KRS-One, Public Enemy -- though the game stupidly varies the music's volume based on how close you are to a sound source. Thus, it's either too quiet or too loud. The voiceovers and effects are super repetitive and came out of the action-game cookie cutter -- though there's plenty of swearing for those of you who are still impressed by that.

The only thing that gives 25 to Life a stay of execution is the multiplayer. It's actually a fair amount of fun. Playing deathmatch with thugs and cops is a fresh enough concept that it carries the experience a short while. The team games are just variations on common match types, but invading the projects to snag some criminals' stash is a new take on capture the flag. Maps are stemmed from single-player levels and have far too many camp points for their own good, making small-number conflicts not worth the effort. Loading is also an issue, but multiplayer is still, without a doubt, the best part of the game.

It's only January, but we already have an early favorite for 2006's Worst Game of the Year award. In terms of graphics, gameplay, sound, and most other categories, 25 to Life is so low on the totem it's underground. Playing single-player is like eating a bowl of dog food: You can stomach one serving without too much discomfort, but you'll be in no hurry to go back for seconds. However, online fiends may find it worth a look for its somewhat-refreshing multiplayer mode. Even still, wait until it's residing in the gaming ghetto known as the bargain bin. It definitely won't take long.